The Christmas Party Guide to Flirting


The two weeks approaching Christmas is your best bet to start a romance, according to new research.

A poll of single people by the dating site maritalaffair.co.uk found that December was by far the most popular month for people to get a kiss, set up a date or make an approach on a crush.

It’s hardly surprising given that the Christmas party season may be the only time of year when you come into contact with people you may have met once or twice before - friends’ friends, an old work reunion, a get-together from your sports clubs or the office bash.

To help you make the most romantic opportunity, the dating site has enlisted the help of top attraction expert Jean Smith, a Social and Cultural Anthropologist and master of social interaction who runs flirtology.co.uk. Here she offers five tips you can’t go to any party without:

1. Instigating the first approach:

Look for signals of approachability. If someone is smiling or their shoulders are facing out to the room it indicates they will be receptive. To instigate the initial frisson make eye contact and then look away then do it again. They will notice that you’ve noticed them. Don’t approach a group. If the object of your desire is talking with a friend wait until they are alone, either at the bar or as they walk between groups.. If they are with a friend and you are with a friend too, move closer to them to make it easier to strike a conversation.

2. Use these body language tricks:

{{Research shows the closer people stand to each other the more attraction they have.}} If their feet are pointing at you it’s a double good sign. If your lucky moment arrives and you do start to talk, let eye contact linger for just slightly longer than what is natural. They will remember it. Mirroring is also good. We subconsciously do this when we feel we relate to someone so give them the sense you are relaxed with them. If they rest their elbow on the table, do the same. Don’t overdo it though or it could be creepy.

3. Keep the conversation flowing:

If it’s your first conversation keep it light and fun. Research shows Britons love cheeky banter where as the French like to provoke deep debate. If you ask boring questions, you will get boring answers so don’t use the same script like ‘what do you do?’ People have answered that 10 times already during the night. Try to spot opportunities for getting onto topics that interest them. If they mention a friend, ask how they know them. It may provide an insight into their hobbies and interests.

4. How do you find out if they have are already taken, without asking outright?

This is probably the most wanted-to-ask-question ever. A simple solution is to ask them what they did last weekend. Usually you can tell by their response if there is a significant other in their life. Listen to their language. If they say ‘we’ it’s likely they are referring to a partner, unless they make it clear that it was some boy’s outing,

5. What if it’s a work party, who is out of bounds?

You can get away with fun flirting in any scenario, especially since it can be put down to Christmas spirit. But if you want to take things further and this is someone who is connected to your personal or work life, weigh up the pros and cons. If you think they have long-term potential then the risk is probably worth the benefits. If you are simply physically attracted to them and want a short-term flirty fling, then beware. The office party or even a close friend’s friend probably has too many dangers to make it worthwhile for anything short-term.

Research commissioned by maritalaffair.co.uk

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